Goals, Plans, Dentist Appointments - and other easily fogotten things.

My husband quit his job last May. I will spare you the boring, corporate details, but basically his job was moved to Minnesota and he (we) chose to not move with it. We don't have anything against Minnesota, but if you've spent any time here in Colorado, you know it is just plain hard to leave. Luckily, this decision has been a positive one. We knew it was coming, so we prepared financially, and now we're just waiting to see what life brings us. Hopefully, at some point, that will include some sort of income.


While my husband has been enjoying his "sabbatical," I have been re-thinking about mine. I re-read the first blog post I wrote. I talked about ending my therapy practice and spending chunks of time caring for myself. I had imagined hiking, taking Master Gardener's classes, writing for hours each day. However, during the past eighteen months, I've done some of that. But mostly, I've helped with homework, attempted to potty-train my stubborn three-year-old, ran countless errands, cooked dinners, etc. You may be quick to defend my mundane activities as just necessary things moms have to do, and I thank you for the support. However, my husband has also done all that. He has always been equally involved in the daily household tasks, but he has also somehow managed to have an awesome summer. (All while caring for my broken elbow, but that is another topic for another blog post.)


My husband being Mr. MBA/finance man is truly the most disciplined, organized man in Colorado, in the World, in the Universe. When he quit his job, he had a list of things he was going to do - play tennis practically everyday, focus on his band (Yes, my finance husband is in a funk/dance/R&B band), hang out with the family. Looking back over the past few months, I realize he has done all of those things. He has also managed to meditate on his future career - "Valerie, let's start our own business." - "What if I start a consulting business?" "How about opening an upscale liquor store?" (as opposed to a sleazy one in a stripmall) "Maybe, we should buy the tennis center - I'm there all the time anyways."


Yes, isn't he wonderful. No sarcasm there - I love him, he's great. But - sheesh - his insane discipline just seems to magnify my total lack of discipline. He's focused, and I'm distracted. He's driven, and I'm along for the ride. He's ambitious, and I'm, well, the opposite of that.


Okay - I'm not as lazy as the above paragraph sounds, but comparing our goals and styles, has made me realize that I have to get on the stick. If he's going to rack up a mountain of accomplishments, then I should be able to do something. Let's go, Valerie - write more, run more (when the elbow heals, again - another topic.), play more. You can do it - focus!


How do you stay focused? How do you achieve your goals?

Back to the Blog

I have been eating salads for breakfast. That's right - lettuce, cucumbers, peppers, the works. I got the idea from the book, Born to Run. The author of this book talks about running coaches who recommend eating salads for breakfast. I tried it because I want to run in a half-marathon this summer. So, I've been running four to five times per week, I've added strength training, I've cut down on sweets, and I'm now eating salad for breakfast.

My running regimen isn't really that hard because I've been a runner for about fifteen years now. The difference in my current routine is that I'm more disciplined and determined. This newfound discipline has got me thinking about goals and why some stick, but others don't. Like this blog of mine. When I started this last fall, I planned on writing one post per week. It sounded reasonable. Not too hard. Not too ambitious.

However, I've had this blog for several months and this is my third (that's right - third) post. It doesn't take a math genius to conclude that I've failed at my reasonable, not too hard goal. It reminds me of an exercise that I used to do with my therapy clients. I would have them stand up with their arms behind them. They would look straight ahead and talk about their goals (or failed goals), and then they would talk about the obstacles preventing them from reaching their goals. When they talked about the obstacles, I would gently pull one arm so their body turns. This exercise shows how obstacles in life diverts our attention away from our goals. These can be big obstacles or just everyday life demands, but it feels like we are cheating ourselves when we let life events/issues get in the way of our attempts to better ourselves.

As a way to stop cheating myself, I am back to posting something on my blog once a week. One of my major goals is to become a better writer. The only way to do that is to write, and then write some more. So, to my seven followers, I will see you next week.